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unborn

by STALKERS

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1.
my life is feelin' checkin the corners for secrets oh lord, I'm filled so much with doubt I hear you in the whispers I tell myself its almost beyond yr help I see your shape in the mirror I can't turn around to see your face gettin' any clearer oh lord, I'm filled with so much doubt I see you in the pictures I paint of myself I guess thats just the hand I dealt selling my soul so I can buy yr love spiral out into the mornin sun oh lord I feel I'm risin' up to the world above I know there's nothing I can say so ill just keep on mutterin' to myself
2.
keeping track of something lost not sure if its even real this pain that I feel its found me at each road ive crossed my house is on fire and I can not put it out its time to hold it tighter before we all fall down im on a train, windows all black an empty space fills up my mind I dont know if im goin forward or if im just turning back my house is on fire and I can not put it out am I moving if I cant see all the world goin by me there has to be a better way or am I just here to stay did I do it did I do it yet have I found my way home I found it inside itself I found that im all alone tell me that its alright tell me that its alright
3.
relativity 03:12
cut up my thoughts put em them back together ive become just like the mother ive got uncertainty its all relative to me ive got no money in my hands ive got no living in yr plans now yr lying in my chair now im dying in yr lair ive got something you dont need ive got power you cant see see me flying by yr room try to catch me if you can ive got time on my hands yr in love with my love like another man kill my energy and take it away keep it hidden, take it far away ive got uncertainty its all relative to-
4.
munich boy 03:10
when I feel so down I think of what you said to me in time all that I could hear it was all just noise my Munich boy feed me with your voice my Munich boy its our time to play, no time to die play with me, ill be yr toy you know im yr toy (looking for love) (day and night) looking for love day and night
5.
a new beginning where everyone lives this time ill see if this is how it ends (and what if I fall in it?) you said you were home I found no one there but a dog sitting on its own staring at a fire step through the door if I step through into it who knows how far ill go
6.
shiny song 06:24
I dont even care at all Im in such a different state of mind its all gone, im going gone I dont want to die until ive found life where is all my time the time I set aside its all my fear but im not all lost its all my tears cause they're long long gone its all calling its burning brighter I dont want to die until ive found the time all the time to live my life the life I set aside its all my feeling but im gone along its all my fear but im not long gone its all time for me now...
7.
junky 05:18
there's a world out there no larger than my own you talk of change buts all just the same you talk of strain but its all just my pain I can almost feel you right here with me but you can not feel me you talk of change but its always the same you talk of strain but its only yr pain but all I see are tears falling down on my lonely heart but all I see are tears its all falling down the eyes that can see their no blinder than my mind you talk of change and I talk of the same in perfect harmony it all just helps me to pass the time you talk of change I talk of the same you of change and I talk of the same but all I see are tears falling down on my lonely heart but all I see are tears its all falling down
8.
sick girl 04:31
sick girl yr on yr own sick girl you know yr feelings are coming I know that its not gone, I can hear it now coming down the stairs and looking round the room for you sick girl yr a vision to see you know you have to dream its hard, life is fine, but now you have a woman to be sick girl its coming clean open yr mouth and say its time to go away too far, I guess ill stay sick girl its coming true but really its all the same im sure that you just want to die "can I please come sit next to you im sure you'll think im strange but I have faith that I look enough like you I think my face has changed"
9.
ripples 05:46
I wanna reach out to you and be a part of your glory force me to choose, im caught between two stories this all I can do to try and get my way this time, I hope that I can feel it... put yr arms around me and hold me tight put yr hands inside me and I hope I can feel them right you can feel it this time... this time I only wanted to feel like you do I can open up the door when I open up my mind I feel you inside and its alright I know who I am or at least, who I was yr life seemed so good to me that I only want to learn but the grass is always greener when you can't climb the walls this time I hope that I can feel it this time I know that I can feel it this time I only wanted to feel like you do I can open up the door when I open up my mind I feel you inside and its all right you can feel it this time!
10.

about

my first ep release collects a series of unfinished and unmastered tracks, all of which have been floating around my hard drive for some time. written and recorded over the course of three years, these songs collect the development and spirit of my early transition, combined with the traumas, worries, and joys that came with it. I release these songs now to be free, as part of transitioning means moving on from what is past, towards new spaces, new ideas, and new perspectives. I hope you find something you like in here.

much love, mara 💗

credits

released September 17, 2020

written, recorded, and mixed by Mara

synths on sick girl and (lost) movies by Rylee

cover photo by Fen
cover design by Mara

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all rights reserved

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STALKERS Boston, Massachusetts

SHADOW
BALLADS

SECULAR
HYMNALS.

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